Less involved is less involved

June 20, 2013

I was thinking about the dynamic of less involved is less involved because of frequent calls I’ve been getting from an investment broker — the more I respond, the more I’m responding.  I can’t reduce the interaction by participating in it.

The concept reminds me a little of people who claim they are really the sort of person who does X (say, gardens), but then finds an excuse not to time after time.  They apparently like the idea of doing X and of being the sort of person who does X and is known for doing X, but they don’t actually do it, so they aren’t, it seems, really that sort of person.

I was thinking yesterday about a comment someone posted on the NYTimes website that touched on the issue of believing other people’s versions of themselves and of us.  It’s so easy for me to go along with them, because I can get swept up in seeing things their way and I can forget that that’s all that I’m doing — seeing things their way.  I have to remind myself that what they’re seeing may not look that way from my point of view, that it’s just their version, that an more objective person might see things quite differently, and take into account frequency of a behavior, for example, instead of trying to rely on a single defining anecdote.

I tend to come to the conclusion that the only way out is to stop assessing and labeling and editorializing and just stick to the facts and express them as neutrally and descriptively as possible.  It’s a much more peaceful place to be.


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